MEssy

There's a lot of fun and thrill in leading a messy life... Going neck-deep into trouble, learning for exams in the last minute, finishing assignments in the nick of time(or even after it!), just walking or jogging to a strange, unexplored place with no map or phone or even a watch (oh yeah, I do that often!).....

I love organising..... my thoughts, my things, my schedule, any little programs.... So much that I let them mess up properly first and then try to sort through the mess.... I love the drastic change it brings... I'd do it again and again just to feel the 'relief' it brings at the end...;)

I'd litter my room for weeks- not bother to clean it up despite protests from my parents (before) or my room-mates(now). And then I'd spend a whole day turning the trash out. Voila! - it's tidier than anyone could ever have imagined it could be!

I'd hog myself up for days - with no exercise at all. I'd wake up late, laze around feeling dull and out of focus for a week. And then I'd wake up early one morning, work out, sweat the laziness out of me and run out of the house, all charged up to face the day!

I'd fight with someone... Bring complex thoughts into my head... Make a mess of their feelings and mine... And then pop! goes something in my head. A phone call/a few words/ a gift - I'd do whatever I can to make up and it's all happy again....

You'd be mistaken if you think that to be unstable(!), wavering.... Looking back on my life, I think I'm steady with the changes...;)... To be more clear, little changes take me off the track but I am within the control limits - I'm back on the track soon.... The resulting graph is lovely, wiggly instead of the boring,straight one or the drastic,curved one.... It makes life more interesting!

Finding a question...!!??

I have never been at a loss, when it comes to asking questions. My nickname at hostel was 'kelvikuri' ('question mark' in Tamil) . When they said that Ph.D. is all about asking the right questions and finding out the answers, I was overjoyed - here is something that I'm good at and that which pays off... ;) Alas! I had overlooked the 'right' part.... It's not similar to asking crappy questions to irritate your friends and taking a cruel pleasure in taunting them, is it? And yeah- I can ask the right questions - if only I did not have to find the answers myself..... with 3 supervisors breathing down my neck, asking for reports and updates.... The toughest part is to make the question scientifically appealing to all the 3 of them.... Oh Gad! Ph.D. is Physically Depriving!